Tag Archives: healing

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Music and Melancholy

As one who is all too familiar with the realities and exhausting effects of depression, I find myself looking for ways to describe it in a more tangible way to myself and the people in my life. The difficulty is that, unlike other infirmities, you cannot see depression like you can see a flesh wound or a broken leg or even a terminal illness. As Parker Palmer (one who has experienced multiple personal bouts with depression) writes in his book, Let Your Life Speak, “I still find depression difficult to speak about because the experience is so unspeakable.” While there

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Getting to the Root of Depression

In my experience, depression has had two opposing effects: it protected me from feeling deep pain but, at the same time, robbed me of relationships and healing. Thirty-eight years ago today, my life was changed forever. What should have been a time of joy and celebration turned into sadness, despair, and a journey into depression. My two infant twin sons were born too early to survive. All the things that I had learned through my childhood about faith and never doubting God's plan began to fade. How could something that I thought was in God's plan go so terribly wrong?

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How to Heal from Traumatic Events

When scary things happen to people we know, in places we have been, like a church or a school, or at concerts we might have attended, or airports we’ve traveled through — there is a quietness of disbelief. An echo of these questions... Why did this happen? Was there a motive? How could something so heartbreaking happen so close to home?  Am I in danger?  When traumatic events occur, they stay frozen like a snapshot in the mind. In these moments, we go into a trauma response — whether it's fight, flight, or freeze. The story gets lost from the narrative

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Leaning Into Your Imperfections

by Kathryn Defatta and Sarah Norris “I don’t have a full length mirror for a reason.” These were some of the first words spoken to me by a dear client of mine as she described the rule she created to keep herself safe from her eating disorder. “If I only look at my face in the mirror, I won’t get sad and angry at my eating disorder because I won’t be able to judge my body.” By choosing to do this, she shuts herself off from the rest of her being and she feels better — but only for a

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Allowing Yourself to Be Weak

A little over a year ago, I had the unfortunate experience of skiing knee first into a tree. In the days and weeks that followed, my body displayed the physical ramifications of this accident in ways I was unable to hide. The physical pain was terrible, but the internal dialogue I battled daily was just as harsh. The voice in my head was unrelenting in whispering cruel messages of self-doubt, shame and fear. That’s life though, isn’t it? Right when we feel as though we’ve found our groove and know how to masterfully navigate the path we’re on, we hit

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Regaining Ownership of Your Heart

We all have a story to tell. We were made to play the leading roles in our personal movies filled with tragedy, hope, heartache, loss, resilience, delight, honor, and betrayal. This array of feelings somehow make a good movie. When I look at a child, they don’t seem to doubt that they are the leading role.   They weep and wail, fight and play, and wish and ask with confidence. We all start in this place of trusting in life and ourselves, until one day...tragedy hits.   A tragedy is something too overwhelming to hold a narrative for or make

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