Tag Archives: needs

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Listening to Your Lonely

Written by Melanie Rogers, MMFT, LPC-MHSP When asked what makes loneliness hard to admit, people of all ages often say that they believe loneliness means they are messed up, defective, a loser, friendless, or unlovable. This condemning voice that calls us names is what Dr. Chip Dodd calls the voice of toxic shame in his book, The Voice of the Heart. Rather than lead us to acknowledge our neediness, toxic shame entangles our hearts, tightly binding them up, leaving us unable to experience full life because we can’t experience our natural place. We believe we should hide who we are, and we center our lives

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Wrestling with Hope

Written by Stephen James, MMFT, LPC-MHSP and Tennyson Dodd, MTS  Sage Hill Counseling has a latin phrase as its motto; Dum Spiro Spero. Translated it means, “While there is breath, there is hope.” When people first encounter this they often comment about how positive it makes them feel. Many imagine hope to be a profound feeling that things will work out for the best. When we really consider this phrase in connection to our everyday life, however, we run into something much deeper. For many of us, Hope is the biggest problem in our lives, not pain. The future is where the

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Sometimes It Hurts

The Gift of Living in Tension with Heartache There is great pain in trying to be authentic, living in the tension of family, work, faith, hobbies, and other responsibilities in a way that reflects who we want to be. The pain of not being with the people we most love is inevitable. From time to time, we all need some suggestions for how to live out our passions in this world, but too often we try to circumvent the pain of living in a broken world with strategies for success. But unless we have our hearts, all our strategies will

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What Your Adolescent Really Needs

Written by Melanie Rogers, MMFT, LPC-MHSP When I tell people I work with teenagers, I usually get some version of this response: "Wow, that’s a tough age. You must be really patient, brave, or crazy." I may be a little bit of all three. The changes that occur in the teenage years make working with (and parenting) teenagers both scary and (potentially) really fun. Whether the “issue” that brings an adolescent into therapy is anxiety, self- harm, sexual acting out, depression, or relational struggles, a parent’s biggest question is some version of: "How do I make my child's pain and suffering

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